


Plastic Spiders

by orphan_account



Category: Red Letter Media, RedLetterMedia RPF
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Halloween, I guess reader is a female, M/M, SO, Vaginal Sex, Zak Bagans - Freeform, appreciation of mike's stomach, but I always write it as a trans man, that's on y'all bb
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-20
Updated: 2020-04-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:07:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23746555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: just laying here with Mike, enjoying the atmosphere of Halloween and the second-hand embarrassment of live ghost hunting
Relationships: Mike Stoklasa/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 22
Collections: Red Letter Media Fanfic Quarantine Collection





	Plastic Spiders

You hummed contentedly, and the sound vibrated against Mike's chest beneath your cheek. The noise triggered Mike's hand, which was resting on your back, into resuming its motion of rubbing slow circles into your skin through your shirt. A lazy smile spread across your face, and you sighed happily.

Mike's chest rumbled with his voice. "What's that, Lassie? Little Timmy's stuck in a well?" You rolled your eyes, chuckling.

It was Halloween. Well, technically, it was November first, since midnight ad already come and gone. You and Mike had spent most of the evening at Jay's, along with a handful of others. You'd gotten peacefully drunk, watching Mike torment, then laugh alongside Rich during an _Evil Dead_ marathon. Jack had gotten far drunker than you, and you'd taken it as a challenge upon yourself to see how many Halloween stickers you could put on him without his noticing (thirty-four). 

After _Army of Darkness_ , Jay had gotten out _The Exorcist_ for his yearly viewing, but Mike had insisted on his and your early departure, the reason being "Because fuck you, Jay."

Of course, you knew it was because there was a live showing of _Ghost Adventures_ on until six a.m., and Mike was semi-secretly semi-very excited to watch it.

The _Ghost Adventures_ episode had started at eight, and in the following three hours, you'd both watch the trick-or-treaters slow down from a flow, to a trickle, to a complete stop. You'd stopped letting Mike hand out the candy; he kept sneaking fake spiders and cockroaches into the handfuls of candy he was giving out. The rest of the night had been spent snuggled into Mike's side on the couch. As you'd drank water and slowly sobered, the two of you had eventually ended up laying down, fully wrapped around each other. You could feel Mike's chuckles reverberating against your cheek every time he laughed at Zak Bagans' embarrassing behavior. His socked feet kept your uncovered ones warm.

The comfort of just laying here with Mike, enjoying the atmosphere of Halloween and the second-hand embarrassment of live ghost hunting had over time developed into a sleepy, low-level arousal. Feeling Mike's stomach rise and fall with his breaths, as well as his slow circles on your back were only adding to the hot feeling in your stomach.

You hummed again, perching your chin on his chest and looking up at him until he took notice and turned to face you.

He raised an eyebrow. "Hm?" His other hand, which had been holding a beer, sat down the bottle and joined the hand on your back.

Letting out a big breath and relaxing even more into his hold, you dropped your head sideways. "I dunno." You made a faux-contemplative noise. "I'm thinking about riding you."

Mike's other brow raised. "Now?"

You nodded. "Now."

"No, you _hussy_." Mike's hand raised and slapped your ass, earning a skwawk from you. "It would be sacrilege to defile this broadcast from his holiest Lord Bagans."

"Oh yeah?" You rearranged yourself until you were straddling him. 

Mike turned his head away, and covered his nipples with both hands. "Yes. I don't tolerate heathens on the sabbath."

You smiled again, stripping your shirt off. "I think this heathen may need a sexorcism," you choked out through giggles.

Mike dropped his hands, and groaned out an exasperated "Oh, fuck you," before you kissed him to shut him up. _He_ hummed this time, and his hands replaced themselves on your hips, while yours pressed on Mike's stomach. When you broke away, he was quick to say, "We're both too sober for those half-assed puns."

"But we're _just_ not sober _enough_ for me to whole-ass ride you," you argued as you started on the buttons of his shirt, revealing his hairy chest.

With a sigh, Mike slid his hands up to your ribs. "I guess you've succeeded in seducing me to your sinful ways. Tell mama I tried."

Happily running your fingers through the graying hair on his chest and the slope of his stomach, you muttered, "I'll happily call your mom to talk about fucking you." Before he can call you a "creepy sex-pervert," you kissed him again, savoring the press of his nose into your cheek and his stomach under your hands. His big, calloused hands roamed up your back, and the sensation made you shiver. Stubble scratched against your chin. Your hands made their way to the fly of his jeans, opening them and sliding inside to palm his mostly-soft cock.

Mike let out a grunt, and, ignoring your groan, gently pushed you back, opening _your_ jeans with one hand with his other pressed against your stomach. The thumb of the hand on your stomach stroked back and forth, and you leaned your weight into your hands, which you'd placed on his thighs behind you. His eyes found yours, and you made an exaggerated grimace, which he returned two-fold before you were both breaking into chuckles. 

Once your jeans were undone, you lifted your hips so he could pull them down, along with your underwear. After awkwardly maneuvering yourself the rest of the way out of your jeans, you returned to his lap, feeling a bit of a thrill at your nudity in contrast to his being nearly-fully-clothed. Mike seemed to notice the difference as well, for his hands were at your waist and his half-lidded eyes were roaming across your body. While he watched, you began rolling your hips against his, aiming to fill his cock.

It soon became apparent that you were succeeding, the bulge of his dick elongating in his exposed boxers. You smiled, arching and letting your head tilt back.

Mike replaced one of his hands so it was tugging at your nipple, and you sighed. "This," he started in a voice gone gruff with arousal, "is _almost_ as good as watching the Halloween _Ghost Adventures_ Live Special."

You stopped the motion of your hips. "Babe... thank you."

Mike smiled, showing off those teeth you loved, and you bent back to kiss him again. You slid your tongue across his lip, rejoicing when he granted you entrance and you could flick your tongue across his teeth. His hand worked into your hair, giving it a little tug, and you let out a little moan into his mouth. He bit your lip, and it returned your thoughts to the heat in your stomach and the wetness between your legs. One of your hands had returned to their favorite place—the swell of Mike's stomach—while the other removed his erection from the confines of his jeans and boxers. The foreskin slid easily over the head of his cock, having already become wet with precome, and you made a happy noise into Mike's mouth when he shivered.

"Can I _please_ ride you, oh impressionable and innocent Sir Stoklasa?"

Mike's stubble scratched against your face when he responded with, "All you had to do was ask!" Then, his hands were on your hips again, lifting you so you could position his cock at the entrance to your pussy with practiced ease.

You stated, straight-faced, "I'm telling your mother about that," before you _finally_ slid him into you. Mike hummed, choosing not to engage your comment. When he bottomed out inside you, a soft " _oh_ " left your lips. At this angle, you could almost feel him behind your fucking _bellybutton_. Mike's fingers dug into you, encouraging your hips to rock back and forth, stirring your insides. You _whined_.

Settling your hands on his stomach again, you lifted up a few inches, swirled your hips, and dropped again. "Ah, fuck," Mike mumbled. You felt him move one of his feet onto the floor for leverage, and he ground his dick up into you. You mirrored his sentiment with your own "ah, _fuck._ "

Shifting into a seated position, Mike wrapped an arm around your waist so he could move back against the armrest. The change of angle worked for you, stifling a moan as you repositioned yourself straddling his lap. Mike leaned forward, nipping at your jaw before bending down to kiss your neck. You started really working yourself up and down the length of his dick, which had the effect of tragically dislodging his mouth. 

His one arm remained locked around you, keeping the angle of his cock in you tight and _perfect._ Mike let out a low moan into your neck, and you clenched your pussy around him, encouraging him to draw out the sound. You leaned away from him, framing his face with one of your hands. "I know you got me in this position so you could watch _Ghost Adventures_ over my shoulder."

Mike grabbed one of your asscheeks firmly, using it to grind you onto his lap harder. "I mean, do you want me to come, or not?"

You whined at the pressure of his pelvis against your clit, and responded, "I've been meaning to propose edging to you."

"You can be the guinea pig," he said, snapping his hips up into you.

Your head dropped back, and you moaned. "I think I might kill you if you don't let me come." Leaning forward, you took his ear lobe between your teeth, sucking on it and earning a moan from Mike. "Please, can I come?"

Mike groaned and, for once, was silent. He redoubled his efforts to grind his cock into your cervix, and you squeaked, before slapping your hand over your mouth. You were able to feel the slick from your pussy where your clit was rubbing against Mike. You felt your orgasm building warm in your lower belly. Mike removed his hand from your ass to snatch yours from your mouth and push it towards your clit. You happily complied, even though it left your mouth open for any noises forced out of you. His other hand moved to your hair, pulling and forcing you into a deep arch.

Your moans were becoming continuous, punctuated with the snaps of Mike's hips colliding with your ass. The arch you found yourself in made it incredibly easy for Mike to duck forward and suck your nipple between his teeth. Your orgasm rushed to you, and you stuttered out, "F-fuck me, I'm gonna _come_ ," before Mike bit your nipple and you shuddered out your orgasm. You came so hard you couldn't hear for a moment, but the second you could, you became aware of Mike's heavy breathing against the wet skin of your chest.

You were entirely oversensitive where your pussy was clenching his still-grinding cock with aftershocks. When his hand released our hair, you put yours in _his_ , pulling his head back until you could suck on his neck, his jaw, his earlobe. When his hips _really_ started snapping, you whispered in his ear, "Come for me, Mike." His breathing got even harder and you felt him still in you as he came. You repeated, "Come for me and Zak Bagans."

At that, Mike started laughing that wonderful wheezing laugh of his, interspersed with moans from his ongoing orgasm. As his breathing slowed, he replaced his hands onto your shoulders, pulling you so that he could kiss his laughter into your mouth. You received it happily, trading soft kisses with him.

The two of you hugged for a while, just enjoying the closeness while the come and sweat still wasn't annoying you.

Mike asked, "Do you think Zak Bagans could investigate the ghost of my dead sperm inside of you?"

You snorted, almost falling out of Mike's lap.

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, hi, I wrote this maintaining a status of being pretty tipsy, kissing emoji, eggplant emoji
> 
> I wanted to write some lazy fuckin'


End file.
